Finding a Soul Mate at Any Age – It’s about Trust

Openness and trust are two ways to generate new friends, meet kindred spirits, and maybe even find a soul mate. My favorite connections are those that seem so familiar it’s like you’ve known each other before—maybe even in a past life, if you believe in that sort of thing. It’s immediate familiarity. A sense of being home and safe with a stranger who is destined to become a significant part of your life. This type of bond doesn’t happen often, but when it does, it’s a gift.

In my life, it’s happened a few times with both men and women. And once these people enter my life, they stay. Years may pass, distance may come between us, but the instant we meet again—in person or online—it’s as if time stood still. We pick up precisely where we left off like the soul mates we are.

As we get older and our friends and family members move or pass away, continuing to make new connections is essential. Sadly, many women find it difficult to make new friends—or they simply don’t try. Instead, they dwell on loss and fond memories of the past. While there may be an element of sweetness to the nostalgia, life goes on. Loved ones can never be replaced, but those empty spaces can be filled with new friends. Deep connections can occur at any time, regardless of where we live or how old we are. We simply must be open and trust the experience.

What do I mean by being open?

Think about the last time you were at a party, event, or gathering. Recall the most noticeable person in the room. It might have been the host or hostess, a guest, or featured speaker. Now think about what makes this individual stand out. Is she smiling and laughing, having a great time? Listening with interest? Comfortable in her own skin? Perhaps this individual is moving around the room, making introductions, filling glasses, or passing around appetizers.

One thing is certain, this person transmits a welcoming message. She’s open to new conversations and perhaps new experiences, as well. The point: to make new friends, you need to be open to talking, listening, and even making the first move.

What do I mean by trust?

Believing that it’s possible to make new friends is an important step. When you meet someone with whom you enjoy talking, trust the connection. If you appreciate the time you’re spending together, there’s a good chance they do, too. Suggest meeting for coffee or some other mutual interest you’ve discovered during the conversation. Exchange contact information and then follow up with a phone call, email, or text.

Being open to reaching out and speaking first is a guaranteed way to expand your circle of friends and quite possibly meet your next soul mate.

Jan Fishler, MA, is currently co-authoring a new book, Don’t Stop Now, Making the Most of the Rest of Your Life (DontStopNow.us). She is also the author of Searching for Jane, Finding Myself (An Adoption Memoir), and has written several articles about alternative health and PTSD. You can learn more about Jan at www.JanFishler.net.