When I was in my late forties and divorced, I decided to give internet dating a try. It was the mid-1990s, and I quickly discovered that lying on one’s application was standard operating procedure.
Time and again, my heart would soar at the prospect of an interesting match, only to have my hopes and dreams smashed like a pumpkin in late November. The “professional athlete” was really a clerk in a sporting good store. The owner of a “cool German sports car” actually drove a VW bug. The guy whose photo showed a thick head of gorgeous auburn hair failed to mention that the shot was taken fifteen years prior—before male pattern baldness set in.
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with any of those realities, so the question remains: why lie? To me, one of the essential components of a good relationship is honesty, and I just wasn’t finding it. Tired of the game, I gave up and joined the board of the local arts council, where I met the man who is now my husband.
My, how times have changed! A few months ago, my friend Vivienne joined an internet dating service. When she told me what she had done, her words pierced my heart like a shish kabob skewer.
“No, no, Viv!” I shrieked. “The guys range from delusional to downright delirious, and you’ll end up going on some really miserable coffee dates.”
But I was wrong.
Today, internet dating is a lot more sophisticated that it was twenty-plus years ago. Here are just a few of the popular options:
- Zoosk – awarded best dating site for their high success rate
- Match – uses comprehensive questionnaires
- Elite Singles – for sophisticated singles
The sites are infinitely more specialized, so you can tap into a narrow, streamlined database. Some cater specifically to singles age 50+, such as:
A little exploration on Google can put you in touch with a very specific match: farmers, tall people, cat lovers, sea captains, sci-fi fans, and book lovers.
By the way, Vivienne is now in a long-term relationship with Henry, whom she met on eHarmony.
Have you tried internet dating? Did it work for you? Please share your story in the comments.